Surviving the first hour …..

Adventure Boot Camp beat the living crap out of me – I really don’t think I need to actually add more to this post than that.

But I will – they beat me, and humiliated me and made me cry – and that was just in the warm up section of the hour.

At this point I felt I wanted to query where they got the fekn happy smiley people on their brochure, because it really was not taken at the class I attended.

This onslaught went on for a full hour – there was running, jumping jacks – fekn Heidi skips!!!

I ask you when was the last time anyone asked you to do a Heidi skip? Do you know how ridiculous you look when you Heidi skip? Do you know how much co-ordination it take to make your leg sort of hang in the air, while you swing your arms? The fact that the flab on your entire body is getting thrown around at such an incredible pace is probably the reason why only six year old girls do Heidi skips.

The hour went on and on. What shocked me more was the fact that the trainer kept saying this is the first day of the first week and we are going to be taking it easy.

I am not sure if someone stopped long enough to tell my lungs and heart that this was the easy part. I was doing all I could not to throw up on the field.

To add to my already humiliating state, I realized that I have zero co-ordination. Jumping Jacks and Ski-ing Movements are beyond foreign to me. It is like doing line-dancing and being the only idiot who is up when everyone is done. (do not take this as any indication that I know how to line dance – you must see me do the Macarena – it is tragic.)

It was sad, it was humiliating and it was painful! I am so unfit and just so far from being able to move faster than a Chuckles-can-roll-off-a-table, that I want to weep!

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5 Comments

  1. Zamzoo

     /  March 14, 2010

    Wow – the REAL ad for boot camp. Funny, I feel your pain, but still want to do it. I have been thinking about it for weeks now, but I think your post is seriously convincing me here.

    Now to get over the “Who will watch the kids while I go” excuse, ’cause fat chance Daddy will oblige, as much as he is so encouraging with his “Commit to it, and I will support you”. Yes, I don’t have help – cause who needs it when they can do it all? Huh?

    Lawd, when last did I run? And I don’t mean after a rumbunctious three year old trying to get her into the bathtub.

    Thank you for encouraging me to start my own blog – I am honestly enjoying yours!

    Reply
    • reluctantmom

       /  March 14, 2010

      Yes, Boot Camp is a bit of a heart attack waiting to happen for me. I have yet to be to one camp where I am not standing there heaving and puffing, and cursing the last bag of Chuckles I hate. The wine is always innocent.

      It is harsh, but an unbelievable work out – if you can just stop yourself throwing up!!!

      Reply
  2. Esethu

     /  March 12, 2010

    heehehhehee. Reluctant mom, you are hilarious!!! I soooo know that feeling of feeling like you’re gonna throw up any second! And they said they were “taking it easy” cos it was the first day! LOL!Maybe they took the pics for the brochures BEFORE that 1st class started!

    Reply
    • reluctantmom

       /  March 12, 2010

      What is even more tragic is that I signed up for another camp ….. I really need to get my last will and testament in order.

      Reply
  3. At least you went 🙂 I enjoy excercising but hate being scared like that!!!

    Reply

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