Does my finger look big in this?

I waxed lyrically yesterday as to how how I am in love with my ring … and promised to post some images, so here they are …

The main stone belonged to my gran who died in 1994  – she was my last grandparent.

When I was very young, I recall being at her house and she put all her rings on the kitchen table and asked me if she died which one would I like to have.  I was really small, so I was more interested in drinking my sweet milky tea and  eating a slice of cake to be too worried about jewellery issues (few things have changed since then).

Fortunately I had the good sense to choose a simple ring, but with a healthy sized diamond (bless her).

So Kennith and I chose a ring design and then used the original stone from my gran’s ring.  So even though the design is “all about me” it has a bit of a heritage in it, which makes it even more special.

I really love this ring.

100th post …

Yesterday was my 100th post and I only realised it now when I checked my stats (I check stats- I also realise how pocket-protector that is)

I thought that was quite cool – and for me quite an achievement.

When I started blogging, I literally thought I was the only person in South Africa who blogged.

I had not even read a blog before I started blogging.  So more naive, just-crawled-out-under-a-rock is going to be hard to beat.

Blogging has been my therapy and saved me and my medical aid substantial psychiatrist fees, so for that I am thankful and Discovery thanks wordpress too.

I have boxes of anti-depressants I have not even opened … might need to start flogging them on http://www.gumtree.co.za soon.  Keep an eye on that site if you are interested in a few boxes of Lexapro, Cipralex, Zoloft and Eglonyl.  Can I legally sell them on gumtree??

I can’t tell you the thrill I get with every “hit” I see and how truly appreciative I am for every comment someone takes time to make.  Some days even the spam excites me.

Even if they are trying to sell me tablets to assist my erection, and panties to tighten my outer labia .  I take the time to read them all… panties arrive Tuesday.

My sense of worth grows with every “good job” comment I receive.  I am truly thankful that I do not feel so alone in this journey through motherhood.

I honestly give thanks that there are so many desperate, off-centered moms, who struggle every day like me – I know I should not be excited that there are so many dysfunctional people, but I am – I love not feeling so alone.

I am excited by our togetherness.  That soon we can outnumber the moms who have perfect hair, perfect nails and who bake cupcakes and who are excited to do arts and crafts.

Viva us, viva moms-who-do-it-differently-with-wine -as-a-prop!!!

Have dress … have prince … need chariot …

For some reason I have kept my “wedding related” stuff off my blog.

I just figured people really were not interested in my arranging to get a “rok” to bounce down the aisle, but it seems there are people who are actually interested.

Not sure why I felt it was appropriate to talk about me wanting to smother my kids and show you pictures of my va-jay-jay, but somehow inappropriate to talk wedding stuff, but there we go.  However I have decided to update those who care with bits and bobs, and I promise not to go on at length regarding the colour of just the right napkin.

Today I went to do the first fitting for my wedding dress, with the dress maker to do the nip and tucking.

I honestly thought I would be the last person to use the term “wedding dress” and “my” in a sentence, but well wonders never cease. I must confess I thought I looked not half bad (yes, I realise I need to slow down on the self praise) and really started to get very excited.  The alteration girl did have her hand up my dress at the time, and no doubt that also added to the whole festival atmospher

The one issue I have about “the wedding day” is I hate to be the center of attention.

I really get embarrassed and start acting terribly stupid when attention is focussed on me.  I am seriously doubting that wearing a large whitish dress is going to assist me to fade into the background in July, and I have concerns about everyone looking at me, which is probably why I wanted to go with a dress that was pretty low-key to being with.

But I truly love my dress, and feel very Princess Bride right now.  I might start singing tra-la-la-la and have little blue birds come and sit on my hand as I bounce around the forest with a large blue bow in my hair …. it is all so intoxicating.

Our friend put us in contact with a jewellery designer who assisted us in designing a ring.  She gave us a few catalogues and of the 7 thousand post-it notes I stuck all over the catalogues, on one I wrote “the perfect ring.”

I got myself in a tizz trying to make any further decisions about the ring.  I just could not decide on what to do and how to make a final decision on something that is so permanent.  Eventually I walked away from the “project” and asked/told/screamed at Kennith to just do it.  I just could not make a decision and time was a-passing and I still u’ming and ah’ing and time he was rushing by.

Friday a week ago Kennith got the ring and did not tell me.  He presented the ring while we were at a pub, drinking beer, watching Bafana Bafana – that boy is so romantic.  I swooned. I nearly lost control of my beer.  The ring is so absolutely divine, I can honestly say “I love it -I love it!”

Yesterday I went to collect the wedding band, and my knees went a little weak.

I was so sure that Kennith would choose something flat and plain- like a wedding band, but he chose this beautifully simple, but totally unique band with such great detail, I just wanted to give him a noddy badge right there and then.  I love the fact that he still suprises me, and makes the effort to try.

So I am really pleased with my dress, I look like a totally fairy princess which is nothing like the normal me.

I am so in love with my engagement ring and wedding band (which we put away) that I could cry.

You know I was the first one to say that getting married would not make a difference and really would not be a big deal, but you know it has made a difference and it is actually a big deal.  I am so excited about the wedding day I could actually just platz, but I am trying to act nonchalant and that it is all so ho-hum.

But inside I am going weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee ……. can you feel it??