Armpits, tits and wine ….

I went along to book club last night.  I used to adore book club.  But in the last year or so, I have got a bit less enamored with it.  I still enjoy it, but I keep thinking do I really?

One of the reasons is that the group is just too big.  At the moment there are nine girls – there were eleven  not so long ago.  Nine girls is not really a group it is  more of a gaggle.

Every single girl in the group is unique and great, and of course you do not actually want to cull anyone.  But at the same time nine girls is just a bit chaotic when one puts them in a room, gives them wine and tells them to catch up.

What usually happens is that the group splits into two or three smaller conversations and the evening feels bitty and disjointed.   Even when we try to speak together about one thing, it really is all a bit loud and frantic.  Not in a too-much-wine-sort-of-fun way, more in everyone-is-trying-to-say-their-piece-and-you-actually-can-not-hear-everyone sort of way.

It is frantic, and actually makes me feel a bit stressed.  Which is probably not the ideal outcome when one thinks about drinks, great dinner, books and your friends – but that is how I have been feeling.

Last night there were only five of us at book club – I could not have been more excited!!

We sat down for dinner and it was brilliant.  We could listen to one person speaking and all get involved in one conversation.  The result is that everyone got to say something and we all got to have a laugh at the same thing.  It was one of the funniest most fun evenings I have had at bookclub in ages.

Laura had made the most divine dinner – something about chicken, lemon and capers and it was lick-the-plate-frek’n-good.  When the dinner conversation started to wind down, someone flashed their arm pit to show how free of hair it was.  I had not planned on dinner and a floor show, but one learns to adapt.

Unfortunately my under arms look reminiscent of what would find at a zoo, hanging off a branch. I went a bit quiet at the hope that the conversation would embark on a different direction.

What proceeded was arm pit showing, and discussions regarding body hair and methods to get rid of hair.  As usual Alice insisted that I go for a Brazilian – I am not sure what that girl’s obsession is with my arse being hair-free, but I have a name of someone who can do it for me ….

Once that was over and we had gorged on dessert, we moved to the lounge area to “do books.”

At some point someone commented that Claire’s breasts are looking really good.  Girls talk like this, it is very strange, but girls do.

Claire wasted no time in lifting up her shirt to show us her fabulous bra – Claire is a specialist underwear designer/buyer/finder person or something of the sort, so tits and bootie are her thing.

It was a lovely bra, and it really did make her appear to be exceedingly well-stacked.  We all had Claire’s-bra-envy.

Claire being a kind hearted soul, then took off her bra – as you do at bookclub.  Sue tried on Claire’s bra and came to show what it did for her girls.

Listen, I am not sure how your bookclub goes, but this is how we roll.  Sue showed us how the bra improved her profile and there was much pointing and rubbing.

Then Laura decided she would also try on Claire’s bra. At no point did this seem like a bizarre set of events, it just all seemed to be quite the norm.

We eventually “did books” – almost as an after  thought.  We ate our body weight in tumbles and winegums and then everyone did the two kiss cheek thing and we went home.

You know, I may not remember the books, but I do remember the funniest evening.  Laughing until tears rolled down my cheeks, and the power of a well fitted bra.

Great evening …