The Life of Georgia ….. Part one

I really should stop the Reluctant Mom blog and create a new one called the “Life of Georgia Blog.”

I could fill reams of gumph about her and the strange things she does all day.  Kennith is working hard at convincing me that she is destined to be a “creative” and I need to give her some latitude.

My concern is that if she cannot get through Grade 1, I doubt even the creative industry is going to be keen on her unless we seriously get in touch with “normal!”

This week alone (besides the usual stuff that happens with her):

Event one:

Last night she was arguing loudly with the invisible police on the telephone – like heckling them – the phone in this case was the hand held shower head in a bath.  Judging by her tone and the change in her voice, I was convinced she was “hearing” the invisible police arguing back?

I mean seriously who argues with the police in the bath?

Event two:

Kennith asked her what she wants for her birthday, so she said make-up. 

Kennith said that make up is YUCH and she must think of something else.  She asked for a tattoo on her arse instead. 

SHE IS TURNING SIX!

Event three:

Monday I fetch her from school –she is playing and has only one boot on.  The other boot is in her bag.  It cannot be comfortable to walk around in one shoe, and a boot at that. 

Driving home I stop at a dam I had seen and wanted to see if we could take a quick look around and go back there on the weekend. 

We stop, we get out, Georgia starts running around the dam – one foot barefoot, one foot still in a boot! 

Surely a sane child would go, hhmmmm this feels a bit odd, let me take the other shoe off!  Surely!

Event four:

On Monday I fetch Georgia from school – I took Isabelle along for the drive, and as Isabelle’s safety chair was in Kennith’s car, I put Isabelle into Georgia safety chair, which is more of a booster seat. 

Seems easy enough.

 I get to the school to fetch Georgia.  She is excited that her sister is in the car, as she adores her sister.

I buckle Isabelle into the safety seat, and Georgia goes ape sh*t – but like totally totally ape.  Full scale tantrum of epic proportion.  It is as if I am ripping her leg off through her nostril!  It went on and on, and escalated rather than started to simmer down.

My level of patience for a tantrum is limited to about 32 seconds, on a good day, 8 seconds on most other days. 

So I leave the school, Isabelle in safety seat, Georgia buckled in a normal seat and Georgia is going totally “postal.” 

I pull over, slam on anchors, RIP Georgia out of the car, I hear Connor go “uh-oh!” 

What I wanted to do is throw her on the sidewalk and scream at her to “just walk the fek home!” what I did instead as tell her that she had two choices. 

1.  Get in the car now, stop screaming and do not even dare cry. 

2.  We reverse and I put her back at the school door step.  I will then phone her father who will have to leave work early to fetch her and she will get a hiding when he gets there. 

Pick one, option one or option two, but I am done with the screaming!  Done!    She opted for option one – clever girl!

Event five:

Georgia has a karate grading coming up.  She tells me it is going to be on Wednesday. 

I correct her and tell her it will be on the 21 May on a Saturday as the notice says. 

She tells me again it is going to be on Wednesday.

I explain that I have a letter and the grading is at the DoJo and will be at 21 May, which is a Saturday and around two weeks away.  We will all go, and we are very excited about being part of her grading.  On a Saturday.  One the 21st.  Not on Wednesday.

She tells me again that the grading is this Wednesday.

I sigh – quite deeply and with a certain measure of despondency.  I explain again that it is on the 21st which is a Saturday and it is about a week away.

Again she tells me that it is this Wednesday.

I talk through my teeth: “Georgia it is on the 21st which is a Saturday, really I have a letter, it is in about a week, it is not this Wednesday.”

She tells me it is this Wednesday.

I go off pop!

I am not sure she believes me about the 21st, but I do think she has learnt that mom really does not want to hear about “this Wednesday” again.

Event six:

Georgia makes up her own school work and homework.  She has zero interest in learning the A B C’s and all of that stuff. 

She however has an entire written language that she is rather proficient in.  Any the who.

She tells me that she has homework to do.  I say no worries; do it later after you have had dinner and a bath, okay?  She says okay.

For whatever reason she did not “do homework” – so she is crying in her bed and telling me to switch on the light – it is about 9pm – so she can do her imaginary homework!

I convinced her that if she woke up early for school tomorrow then she could sit at her desk and catch up on her homework then.  She was not happy about the suggestion, but it did stop the crying.

You do understand we are crying about imaginary homework!

Okay, so that is this week’s strange.  I have excluded the other reams of strange that go on pretty much all the time in our neck of the woods.

Someone suggested you are never given more than you can deal with, I am not so sure.

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19 Comments

  1. joanne

     /  May 17, 2011

    The bath and the TAT are LMAO funny. Reminds me though (unfortunately for you), that our children are our mirrors!

    Who do you talk to in the bath? and where is your ‘secret’ tat? hehehe…..

    Reply
  2. wendy

     /  May 16, 2011

    Love this post! My daughter is kind of kooky and I’m very glad to see we’re not alone! Thanks for sharing

    Reply
    • reluctantmom

       /  May 17, 2011

      No, it seems we are not alone …. I am not always sure whether to take comfort in that or be more freaked out.

      Reply
  3. Charne

     /  May 15, 2011

    That one is her mothers daughter!!
    Celeste, let me to remind you of something you said to someone very recently: ” your wedding pictures only confirm why I heart you quite a bit. Your images reveal that you, my love, do not walk the path most tread – you appear to have found a unique drum beat that you march to ……….. very nice”

    So maybe just heart that Georgia has also found a unique drum beat that she marches to? Treasure it, she sounds AWESOME!!!

    Reply
    • reluctantmom

       /  May 15, 2011

      Nice, remembering my stuff and then throwing it back at me ….. bold and clever move. Touché!!

      Reply
  4. Mandy

     /  May 14, 2011

    I was reading some of your blog RM and your graphic story telling ability lead me to realise that…….. these are all the things I have to look forward to when Jordyn gets a little bigger!!!!

    Reply
  5. I have to agree with all the other commentators. I llove Georgia. She is supercool. And please don’t sweat stuff like the shoes – my anal little Felix would NEVER wearonly one shoe, and that worries me sometimes more than if he DID! 🙂 Whatever our kids do we stress about… and they’re all cool. It’s great she’s also so comfortable about her own personality. How womnderful. I’m a bit jealous.l..

    Reply
  6. LOL I loved this bit “My level of patience for a tantrum is limited to about 32 seconds, on a good day, 8 seconds on most other days. ”

    I’m the same.

    I love her craziness because I really do love unique, different kids. Isn’t normal boring? 🙂

    Seriously, I know it must be hard to parent her though but on the bright side, one day she’s going to be uber rich and support you.

    Reply
    • reluctantmom

       /  May 13, 2011

      Thanks Marcia, I do love Georgia’s uniqueness, but sometimes I find it profoundly exhausting! Poor lamb chop.

      Reply
  7. The photo is gorgeous!
    She sounds to me like the person we all want to be! Following our own inner compas, no matter what!

    Good luck to you! 🙂 (handling her!)

    Reply
  8. To Love Bella

     /  May 13, 2011

    Don’t hate me, m’kay?
    I love Georgia. I love her eccentricity. She is a combination of my brother and I growing up. We are both creative and we are both quite normal. I had an imaginary friend as a child and would spend hours with ‘Uncle Harry’ and such. I was awarded a special certificate at Primary School because of my imagination. I LOOOVE that Georgia has such an incredibly imaginative mind!
    I know that you don’t want to hear these things, and we all laugh – but that you are worried / concerned / frustrated.
    She is an awesome little girl. I totally fell in love with her (actually, ALL your children!) at J’s Babyshower.

    Reply
  9. Karen

     /  May 13, 2011

    I have one child like that (she is an only child). I feel exhausted to the core and love her to bits. She decided this week that she will no longer read from left to right. From now on it is right to left for her, because she is a ‘Right girl’ and she ‘doesn’t even like Left’. She did all her homework from right to left. Nothing I said or do could change her mind. She doesn’t care if it is marked wrong – that is what she wants to do and so be it.

    She also dug a ‘fall hole’ for lions at the Kgalegadi park, it took her ages, was more than a meter deep and she was so disappointed that there was no lion in it the next day.

    She made wings from hard board, and is convinced that once she stuck feathers to it, she will fly (it doesn’t work without the feathers)

    She doesn’t care much for the teacher’s stars, so she simply doesn’t try to get any. She is happy with her own internal guide of right and wrong.

    When you wrote about your little girl sitting happily ‘alone’ in a group of little girls I nearly sobbed. That is my daughter too. Quite happy on her own and completely in her own world. So unique, so stubborn, so wonderful but so alone and sometimes so challenging. It was only when you wrote about it that I realised that she might need help too (just goes into her own world and happily stays there no matter what crisis I might experience in this world.)

    I enjoy her and life is never boring with her – thanks for ‘sharing’ Georga with us. She always makes me smile. I especially loved the tattoo on the ass story – how original is that?

    Reply
    • reluctantmom

       /  May 13, 2011

      Thanks Karen, I think knowing there are more “Georgia’s” out there makes me feel less “concerned” about her.

      Reply
  10. Tania

     /  May 13, 2011

    What a special child! What a total sweetie pie.I would probably feel as you do if I was her mother but looking in from outside ” different is great ” …who wants a kid that does everything everyone elses kids do, or?

    Reply
  11. Scared & Imperfect Mother

     /  May 13, 2011

    RM I completly agree with K the “Life of Georgia Blog.” would be great.

    I dont know which one is funnier, the one shoe or the imaginary homework.

    Reply
  12. I have to agree that some are rather strange, but as to the following:

    Event 2 – my 6 year old would ask exactly the same. She adroes make up, she loves temp tattoos. She asks me regularly when she can have a needle (real tattoo0. Kid you not! My answer is after 18.

    Event 4 – yes, that would be my little man L to the tee. He can not handle a “change” like that. (He has sensory integration disorder – they hate change)

    Sweetie, I know it is tough to deal with a kid that is “different” – I have one too. And I know you have taken her to psychologists etc. but what about an ordinary OT and a pediatric neurologist?

    Reply
  13. Oh bwahahahahaha – I can so relate 🙂

    I no longer give Kiara options though – when I do she chooses option 3 out of only 2 options. The other night they were both testing me before we even got home so I said I would take them back to after care if they didnt stop – she replies “How late will you fetch us?” – with a tone that suggests she would prefer to go back to after care.

    The shoe thing has also happened.

    Maybe her and Georgia could join up one day and become creative ginats like Steve Jobs or the FB dudes?

    Reply
    • reluctantmom

       /  May 13, 2011

      Sounds fabulous about Georgia and Kiara – goodness knows how they will get any “real” work done, but no doubt we can solve that later!

      Reply

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