There is no pleasure worth forgoing just for an extra three years in the geriatric ward. ~John Mortimer
Last night I sat and worked out a time line focused on when the kids would be in what grade. I was interested in the year they would finish at a school to go to another – you know grade versus year stuff.
I was aiming to establish when there might ever be a year where I would be driving to one school with kids, or whether I would permanently be a mom-in-transit across several schools.
I got really excited as I thought 2015 was my year, but then I realized I had made a calculation error, and 2015 was not going to be my year.
I will always be going to a minimum of two schools to drop off and collect kids. Three if we decide to send Connor and Georgia to single-sex high schools.
Some years I can look forward to:
2016 – Isabelle will start Grade 1 and it is the same year that Connor starts high school. I will be 44 years old with a daughter in Grade 1 as I face parents entering the school with their first-born. The bulk of them will probably be in the 25 – 32 year age range. These parents are going to be all shiny eyed and bushy-tailed. Eager little beavers. I on the other hand will be a complete jaded wreck! That should do wonders for my self-confidence and ability to offend parents at get togethers.
2019 – The years I will start driving to three schools; two kids in separate high school and one in primary school.
2020 – Connor will finish high school. I will have Georgia in a different high school. Isabelle will still be in
Primary School. That will be a bumper year for driving, but it will mean Connor will be getting ready for University/Fishing College.
2023 – The girls will both be in high school, so this might be the year where I am driving to one school assuming they are at the same school.
2024 – Connor will be in his final year of University (I am allowing for 4 years). Georgia will be starting University/Beauty/Art School and Isabelle will be in Grade 9. So in theory, I could be dropping one child off at one school (I figure university = get there your damn self)
2028 – Isabelle will start university. Connor will be 4 years into paying back his University loan. Georgia will be in her first year of paying back her university loan and I will be 56 years old! This will be the first year that I will not be driving a child to a school and fetching them again. This is working on the premise that no one fails, and life goes to “plan.”
14 years – that is how long I will be driving to and from the EXACT SAME Primary School that my kids are at now. Connor started there in 2009 and Isabelle will finish there in 2022. I have been doing it for three years already and I am already bored out of my tree.
I will be 59 with a child in final year university.
Right there, that alone is an argument in favour of teenage pregnancies (as you are a younger parent when you r kids are big, incase that statement did not make sense on first read).
My friend Warren, kindly did an age progression image for me, so here is what I will look like when I attend Isabelle’s Graduation from University (I did ask him to make me look 60, I think he was aiming for 70 or 75….).
I really hope they have a Zimmer frame facilities and an open bar!
So, how is your time line looking?
reluctantmom.wordpress.com 
Hilary
/ July 13, 2011With a 3yr old & a 5mnth old my only calculations for now is – When the hell will I ever have 8hrs uninterrupted sleep again? 3yrs? 4 maybe? Anybody?
reluctantmom
/ July 13, 2011Yes, sleep trumps school drop offs any day of the week … everything pales in comparison ….
pamiejane
/ July 5, 2011considering I am 39 and my first child is only one I still have a hell of a lot of driving in front of me. I am most definintly going to be the oldest mommy at playschool.
joanne
/ June 24, 2011The only calculation I do is how many years I have to save to be sure my son has a car to drive his sister around in.
By my maths, I only have 12 more years of driving kids around, then my son will get a car and if he wants petrol money, he better be wiling to do all the driving.
Marcia (123 blog)
/ June 22, 2011Hilarious! Best post I’ve read in a long time! And this is when I’m thankful I have twins – now if only those twins will go to the same school, life will be (kind of) good 🙂
reluctantmom
/ June 23, 2011See how we can find happiness in the details ….
julz
/ June 14, 2011Oh my hat I would love to insert 100 laughing smiles!!!!!!! This has made me laugh and nearly cry.
I am exhausted just reading this, but the picture. Brilliant.
MomAgain@40
/ June 14, 2011My teen is going to university next year, and we are already doing the rounds with the toddler!
Depressing… Thanks for reminding us! NOT!
reluctantmom
/ June 14, 2011It is all bleak bleak bleak …….
LoriF
/ June 14, 2011Okay you have finally made me feel better about only having one kid – with having had my first at 40 imagine what my time line would have looked like with more.
On the bright side we may avoid university as Ethan has decided on Sunday that he wants to be a drummer.
This post also made me revisit the value of moving around – if only to avoid the same route to school!
reluctantmom
/ June 14, 2011I used to take alternate routes to the school, but now I am tired of that as well …. it is going to be a loooonnngggg 14 years!!!
cat@juggling act
/ June 14, 2011Oh I think you look good at 60. In any event, rest assured that I am one year behind/ahead/older??? than you – I will be 45 when the twins got o grade 1. And you know the timeline from thereon. With luck I will have 5 years of the kids in one school (primary) but that would be the end of that luck.
Gerne
/ June 14, 2011I think you are going to be a great looking 59 year old standing next to your last one in university!
Lea White
/ June 14, 2011You’re looking good in the future :-).
Let’s see – This year my 8 year old is in year 3 and her school goes to year 8. In 2012 my 5 year old will start at the same school as a new entrant so then I will have both at the same school – one drop off. Right now I have 2 drop offs (school and daycare).
In 2014 / 2015 I’m hopeful my kids will be able to walk to school (considering we live close by with no real busy roads to cross). In 2017 my oldest will start high school or college as it is known here and she will then in all likelihood take the train / bus and by that time my youngest will be in Year 2 / 3 so at that stage will definitely drop her off because she’ll be a bit too young to walk by herself.
Then when my oldest goes to university she’ll definitely take the train / bus because we have such a great public transport system.
Tania
/ June 14, 2011I have both kids in the same school from Grade R through to Grade 12. By the time Emily reaches high school Ethan is done and studying in Pretoria, close to home. That is if we do not relocate and the school does not close down which I don’t see happpening.
Countess
/ June 14, 2011you are a frikkin hoot!
and you’ve totally put me off having a third child.
p.s. I think your photo shopped photo looks hot!
Amanda vd Westhuizen
/ June 14, 2011Celeste,
looking good at 60!
Nes
/ June 14, 2011My mom was 25 when she had me, 28 for my one brother, 31 for the other and 39 for my baby sister. She is 54 now and my sister has just started high school, I just finished my MSc. and my one brother is finishing his while working CT and the other is in 2nd year. She manages just fine at graduations (she has been to 4 already-no zimmer frame :p ) and a lot of people don’t have kids so young anymore so she gets on fine with my sisters friends moms too. Also you can always buy Connor a car and get him to do lift schemes (although he might have issues with you then) but that would cut down the 14 years! Love the pic! Fun post all round 🙂
Romaine
/ June 14, 2011BROAD SMILE, LOUD Laugh, thanks Celeste smiling broadly as I type this. I enjoyed this post and the pic rounded it off nicely 🙂
Just this morning Gary and I were discussing age and he is very disturbed about aging I on the other hand couldn’t be bothered.
By the way I think you will still be very pretty 60 or not…. LOVE THE PIC….. hehehehehehe
Charne
/ June 14, 2011And you wonder why you can’t sleep at night…………