Monday mutterings ….

Kennith and I acquired a car that definitely screams “Your Sexy is Never Coming Back!”

We officially look like a family of plumbers or electricians.

The issue being we wanted 7 seats and a boot.  Not two kids in the boot.  Which appears to be the default design for most “big family” cars.

Problem with some of the bigger cars/soccer mom vans was they did not fit into our garage.

Crazy people who built our house, ignoring things like standard garage size and good paint.

We test drove a white VW Caddy.  Decided that even though it did not drive us wild with excitement. It did appear to be very practical, and loosely within our price range.

We then explained to the friendly car salesman that we were interested in the car, but could we have it in silver.

The answer was yes, but we had to wait four months.  Kennith and I cannot feasibly juggle our lives and one car.

There was an alternate to the white one.  It was brown.

I realised my mental capabilities are flawed at the moment.

But seriously.

It must have been a very bad day at the VW Caddy factory when they decided that “brown” was a great colour for a car.

Brown is super for chocolate and some furniture.  I have seen pants and shoes that brown works for.  Tree bark is totally rocking in brown.   Baby poo is better in brown, than say green.

But not for cars.

I am not sure there EVER is a time when brown is a great colour for a car.  I might be wrong.  Maybe I have just never seen the right shade of brown on a car.

Maybe.

We are now the proud owners of a “very hot and happening” VW Caddy.  Please keep an eye out at your next robot.  Or call us on our new 0800 number.  We also do paving.

On another non-related story …

Wednesday I popped down to the psychiatrist for a little “how are those meds going?” visit.

The short answer was “not well.”

Things are definitely very out of control. In my head.  Not on the planet in general.  Though they could be.

I suggested we stop pea-shooting the charging rhino and bring out the big guns.  A bazooka or an uzzi is sort of where I am pitching this.  I am about done with the “wait and see” subtle approach.

Let’s get it on like Donkey Kong!

Right?

We have brought out the big guns.  They include several boxes from the pharmacist.

I would love to say they are working a treat.  I really would.

They have however left me shaking and mumbling under my breath, and well feeling pretty crappy all around.  I must confess that sleep is no longer a problem.

So far Kennith has made me about 6 cups of tea that I never drank. He offers. I say yes.  He walks to the kitchen. By the time he gets back I am mimicking a light coma.

If you challenged me in rock-paper-scissors I would get it wrong right now.  I might pull out wig-wam.

Wig-wam does not beat anything.

On the upside I am definitely less panicked.  Still anxious.  But less panicked.  Not a total win-win situation, as I have gained have several other interesting side effects which we can chat about on another post (None of them include anal leakage – have you noticed how the insert  on drugs always refers to anal leakage at least once occurring in one of the control groups?).

On Friday afternoon I called my pdoc (Pdoc is short for psychiatrist.  Tdoc is short of psychologist.  True story.) and explained my symptoms.  I really was not feeling great.  Grim might be an accurate assessment.

He suggested I keep on with the meds, and I have had a bad reaction.  Maybe Monday or Tuesday I would see a shift in the right direction as my body (read brain) settled down.

I explained to him that I am not a suicidal person.  But Friday morning had me working out a plan.  Like jotting it on the side of my box of anti-depressant type of plan.

Even I could see this was not a healthy direction.  For anyone.

He suggested I wait it out.  And not to worry as I was not alone.

He is off until the 12 September on holiday.  Ironic?

I wished him a good holiday. And hung up.  I decided a lie down and a cup of tea, was not my worst idea.  I redrafted my plan on my brown box.

Let’s see how Monday and Tuesday fare.

Overall.  Me = Not Great.

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13 Comments

  1. Mike

     /  August 30, 2011

    You probably know this but Gareth Cliff has a page on his 5FM blog reserved just for brown cars. Readers who spot brown cars in the traffic can take pic and handily upload them to his site for people to laugh at.

    http://www.5fm.co.za/djs/gareth-cliff

    Jeremy Clarkson said (so it must be true) on an episode of Top Gear that by owning “People Carriers” you are effectively saying to the world “I’ve had my babies and I’m just waiting to die”

    That’s why I’ve been driving the Renault Scenic for the last few years and Anita has been driving the Audi A4!

    Reply
  2. I hope your meds have kicked in and you’ve stopped writing on the box. As for your doc, dear Lord, has he no urgency???

    Totally with you on the unsexy nature of brown cars 🙂

    Reply
  3. Colleen

     /  August 24, 2011

    ok saw a brown UPS van yesterday and thought of you!

    Reply
  4. Anne

     /  August 23, 2011

    is it something in the water? weird! especially ’cause I’m on the other side of the planet. is it really weird that it makes me feel a bit better to know that someone else is going thru it too? not that i wish it on anyone…just that i’m not the only one. hope the day gets better for you and that they gave you the really good stuff. i wonder if you have have any better meds there than we do here?

    ps – love the wry smile stuff. pinned a couple on pinterest so maybe someone else will too…. http://pinterest.com/annemarshall/gaffaws-and-giggles/

    Reply
  5. Bevan

     /  August 22, 2011

    I’ve had 2 brown cars, a Renault 5 and a Jeep.

    The Renault was my 1st car, I had no say and it was a cheap, crap car so it all sorta worked.
    The Jeep being brown was also appropriate as the mud stains just blended in after my camel-man wannabe adventures off road. The extreme diesel thirst did not blend well so I moved on.

    Personally, I can’t wait to see your brown VW Caddy.

    Reply
    • reluctantmom

       /  August 22, 2011

      Bevan, we will need to disappoint you as when we were faced with brown and white for a car, white made far more sense.

      Reply
  6. Justine

     /  August 22, 2011

    Dear R-mom,
    I was going to send you the “smiley” “hug” and “big kiss” emoticons, but then realised I would probably be charged with “assisted suicide” !
    I discovered your blog on Saturday night whilst having a “Pinotage induced pity party” alone in my office, snot and tissues flying, feeling I am the only one in the world with – let’s call it – CHALLENGES. Mine comes in the form of 3 step children and an emotionally absent ostrich for a husband.You made me ROFL ! I’ve personally come to the conclusion that we are very “normal” woman living in a crazy insane world! We have to adapt and survive by all and any means. We should all guiltlessly adopt, expand, develop and maintain the S.S.A.P – Survival Sedation Alleviation Plan which, depending on the level of danger (either to yourself, your family or any living soul or object within a radius of 50km) can be upgraded to the E.S.S.A.P (Emergency Survival Sedation Alleviation Plan). – something like ‘Code Red” in Navy terms.

    The survival plan includes, approves and support:-
    (1) any form of alcohol (although vino is the preferred method in this catagory)
    (2) any form of pharmaceuticals – legal or obtained very creatively on the “black-market” which can be taken orally, anally, with or without water, injected, smoked, crushed, mixed and then smoked. A sandwich stuffed with smoked chicken and Wellbutrin also qualifies
    (3) Any form of tobacco ranging from Dunhill Infinite Lights – Texan Plain.
    (4) Swearing aka dirty aka filthy language : here we have to impose certain restrictions – all words and expressions referring to the female anatomy or to the female are excluded. Words such as D***s, P****s, C****t, Titface and bitch are beneath us. Please stick to any variety of F**k, prick, poepol, drol, shit (any variety ie. shitty, shitface, shitless), asshole etc.

    ESSAP is still in the formation stage – so please any one who wants to help draft the constitution, Reluctant Mom is our President and you obtain automatic free membership for life!

    Thats me – over and out !
    Please stay sane enough to keep us sane!
    Justine

    Reply
    • reluctantmom

       /  August 22, 2011

      Thanks Justine, we must think of a catchy slogan and a jingle … something we can hum … and dance to.
      You are too funny and really made me smile! Cheers.

      Reply
    • do you have a blog? I like your writing style. funny.

      Reply
  7. brown cars were cool and hip in the seventies as well as brown clothes, brown wall paper and brown furniture.

    am a teeny bit peturbed over you writing your plan on the brown box. not normal behaiviour and makes me frightened for you. ask kennith for help? please.

    Reply
  8. Sharon

     /  August 22, 2011

    Gawd! Does your Pdoc have a clue? How can he say hang in there till Monday/Tuesday if he’s buggering off for a few weeks? Now what??
    I really hope that the meds settle and you do actually start to feel better!
    As for the brown car, I simply cannot imagine it!

    Reply

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