Baby Competitions … bah humbug!

We have all seen them “please go along to xyz and vote for my nu-nu…” – moms like to enter competitions for their babies and children.

Fathers appear less interested.  Fathers appear to not really give a crap actually.  Unless the competition included beer as a prize, then maybe they would get behind some tiaras and ruffles.

I am not sure exactly what is behind the psyche of parents {normally mothers} who enter baby/toddler/children competitions.

Why as mothers we feel we want to put our children out there, and so desperately need public acknowledgement that everyone else agrees our child is the cutest/sweetest/most cherub inspired one?

I think that would only be fair if you could tell a mother that their child was actually butt ugly — but you can’t – – public decorum does not allow you to do that.  So all children – even the ones that are not beautiful, have to be told they are beautiful — the point that I am making is that when someone used to “awwww” and tell me that my baby was so pretty/beautiful, I would raise my left eyebrow in doubt, as I figured, what else really were they going to say.

The main problem with baby competitions – other than that they are pretty naff, is that they bring out the worst in people.   I know there is this feeling that “we should not judge you” – but here is a newsflash – put your child in a baby/toddler/child beauty competition and I will judge you.  True story.

Everyone believes their child is the most beautiful and the most perfect child.   I share this mass thinking – I think believe know Isabelle is without a doubt the most beautiful 2 year old there is.  I melt when I see her.

I wonder why anyone even attempts to have a child, as once they see Isabelle, they will know that perfection has been created, and everyone (EVERYONE) comes out second best.

I do however stop my obsessive adoration of my child at entering her in to competitions.

I have seen cuter kids (no I haven’t), and I have seen uglier kids (oh gawd, yes I have), and there is absolutely nothing I need that much which will require me to pi.m.p my child to win a competition.

I will confess that with Connor I was a bit more “competition befok” – as I was so sure he was without a doubt the cutest baby the world had ever seen.  I was a new mom, clearly my vision was blurry from lack of sleep.

It appears I was mistaken, he never won anything.  I entered several.  And I was devastated each time I did not get a call that he had won.

I thought “of course they must see how precious he is!!” and then they didn’t, and then I thought “okay, what’s wrong with him…?”

With Georgia I did not think about baby competitions. I was in the middle of a bit of a breakdown, so I will confess that competitions ranked pretty low on my list of priorities.

With Isabelle I really could not be arsed.

Probably because I realise the competitions are not about whether your child is really the most beautiful child in the world, or the most special, it really is about the mother needing some sort of public affirmation, and also about greed.  I also really hate the whining and begging that goes on for “votes” ….

No one would enter the competition unless there was loot at the end of the tunnel.

It is hard to say “I am going to enter my child into this rather tacky contest, which is nothing more than a meat parade. I will then proceed to annoy friends/family/Facebook mates by pestering them to vote for me, because really I want the big screen television like no one’s business.  I fully understand that my kid is not winning because they are really the most beautiful, but they have a chance of winning because mom/dad is well connected and has tons of friends to go and vote.  And all the promoters of the competition want is high traffic to their site so they can sel the advertising spots ……!!”

Nope, the phrases used are “it will be fun for little Cameron/Janet/Sarah/Johnny….” but actually baby competitions are not fun at all.  For anyone.  They are not indicative of hard work, or skill, or talents, they are simply whether you get the most votes ….

Unless you win, then they are trucks of fun.  Please stop entering them.  Please stop …. please ….