Fat Chick in Sequins on Saturday Night! Beware, cover your children’s eyes.

My lovely friend Alice is turning 40.  This Saturday she is hosting a Carnivelesque themed birthday party.

And more importantly I get to go.  By invitation.  Not hopping over the back fence like last time.

I am not a big fan of dressing up.  I am more a jeans a t-shirt kind of girl.  Difficult to fk up that outfit.

I seldom sense the mood sufficiently and tend to err on the wrong side of what is considered “right” when I do dress up.  But I am a fan of Alice.

So I have dragged myself to a few dress up stores, and made the effort, because that is what you do when you have a fabulous friend who asks you to.

I squeezed myself in to too many outfits that screamed “FAT CHICK!” and at about the point where I was starting to lose all hope and weep rather loudly in the changing cubicle the shop owner came over to give me some moral support.

She suggested I pop around to China Town and buy something from there.  I indicated to her that by directing me out of her store she was losing business, and really I could not see myself purchasing clothes at China Town.  She patted my hand, gave me a knowing wink and said that at China Town there were some things that would amaze and alarm me equally.

She explained that it was often cheap and often big on the bizarre so I could find an outfit there with a bit of imagination.

So there I was browsing at China Town.  It really is a very alarming place.  An overwhelming smell of synthetic overwhelms your senses. I tend to smell clothes when I shop.  I chose not to at China Town.

The first store gave me hope that this was truly the place to buy outfits for a night of bizarre dressing.  Three stores later I ended up buying something that does not look disimiliar to a matric dance dress – it has sequins and spaghetti straps, and chiffon belt effort.

Very very disturbing – cost me about R175.00 or there abouts.

I bought a striped jacket to add that circus flare – perfect!

I now have an outfit.  Granted it will look like a car accident, but it is an outfit.  And not something you pop in to the 7-eleven wearing to grab a bottle of milk en-route to said party.

I have aspirations of large false eyelashes, but I know that I am going to end up with glue on my retina and an emergency room visit, but I am willing to take the gamble.

I need to do some dress-making amends to my matric dance dress – it appears China Town does not offer seamstress skills on premises – go figure.

I have just not got my arse in gear this week to visit a seamstress – so plan to safety pin it together into an amended version of itself.  I did manage to hire a very cool hat that had feathers and was too wonderful not to rent. I could actually wear jeans and a t-shirt and just the hat and I would look fabulous!!

Photographs to follow!!  {much retouched and soft lighting photographs – the real life stuff might not be suited to sensitive viewers and will alarm the tender hearted}

What every you are doing this weekend, whether it requires sequins or just some old tracksuit pants and a lie on the couch, I hope it is a good one – the wine is cold, the kids are quiet and you get to hold the remote for just a little bit.

Enjoy the weekend  xxxx

Photograph sourced through: http://www.coplandphotography.co.uk/

PS:  By the time you are reading this I will be writhing in pain as I attend another visit with my friendly (but strong handed) wax person.