I started to realise why Michael Jackson dangled his son over the balcony railing ……

This morning started with a THUD.

Isabelle fell out of bed and hit the floor. It is funny how as a parent you actually wake up with the thud – you actually hear it!  If you weren’t quite a wake the ensuing screaming would wake you and loosen your bowels.

I put Isabelle in bed with me, with the optimistic hope she would self sooth and we could sneak another 30 – 45 minutes of sleep.

In theory not a bad idea. In practice, Georgia woke up with the screaming and came through to assess the damage.  Her way of assessing is talking incessantly and trying to hug Isabelle.

The talking made me cry, the hugging made Isabelle cry. I knew the morning was really going pear-shaped, when at one point I actually put my hand over Isabelle’s mouth so she could hear me say: “Okay, okay quiet, quiet, I will get you a milk bottle!”

I realise covering your child’s mouth sounds a bit high risk behaviour, but seriously I started to realise why Michael Jackson dangled his son over the balcony railing …… what ever Blanket did before that, I guarantee he never did it again!!

Isabelle stopped crying.  Eventually.

I had to banish Georgia to her room as she was not going to stop talking.  The result was I was standing make a hot milk bottle at about 06h15 this morning and drinking tea through bleary sleep encrusted eyes.

I will be honest and tell you I usually leave the morning routine to the lovely and talented Priveledge … but this morning not so much.  Kids had dressed, eaten, and were ready to go and it wasn’t even 07h00 this morning.

The day was busy, and had the usual too much stuff crammed in to it.

I always like to push the envelope, you know exactly at the point when you are about to break, I like to add just that ounce more to see if truly I can go insane.

I took the kids out for dinner.  By myself. Kennith is away.  Me. Three kids.  A table with cutlery and crockery.  How did I know it was going wrong? At about the same time that Isabelle started taking her clothes off …. for no apparent reason in the middle of the restaurant …. I managed to stop her after shoes, socks and her belt had come off …. clearly I could see the direction this was going to go in.

End of day, sitting on Isabelle’s bed getting ready to read her a bed time story, Georgia is sitting on the bed with her 1/4 cup of hot chocolate – I fill it very shallowly because she is one of those kids who will mess/spill no matter what.

In an attempt to not disappoint and remain true to form, Georgia went on to spill her cup of now lukewarm chocolate all over the bed.

Isabelle will not touch something if it is wet.  If she is wearing a shirt and wets a sleeve, even with a few drops of water when she brushes her teeth in the morning, she wants to change her shirt.

So you can imagine the joy when you pour 1/4 cup of hot chocolate over her bed … with her in it.  Is it too late to start drinking wine?

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8 Comments

  1. I have five words for when my husband is away (okay fine, when he’s home as well…) : Woolies ready-made kids food.

    Reply
  2. Feel for you! This morning I was frustrated by how, despite having woken up at 6.15am (voluntarily, I may add – with tears in my bloodshot eyes) in an attempt to create order, it was almost 8.30am by the time I got my 2 out the door – and that was with all three of us in tears (okay, I was on the verge) and I hadn’t even managed to shower or eat breakfast. It’s not so much the actual noise, disorder, drama, but my seeming inability to make progress and to smile through the ‘rainbow of chaos’ (as a friend so beautifully puts it) when so many other mums out there are so effortlessly capable! My frustration is less with the wee ones and more with myself for not doing this parenting thing better. And then I have to dig reaaaallly deep and scrabble around to find what my alter-ego (I’m a yoga teacher when I’m not being a stressed out mum) would say to me, and it’s all good – slow down, go easy, there’s no rush, you are doing a wonderful, wonderful job, we are all doing our best and that’s all anyone can ask for, the kids are wonderful and we will all be absolutely fine. And that’s what I’d say to you too. Mwah. PS And the question isn’t whether it’s too late to open wine, it’s whether it’s too early, and the answer is never 🙂

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  3. Re the Spur thing. .. I am so over that place due to all the too many visits during the formative years in my children’s life. The smell is enough to make me mini-vomit in my mouth and their semi-sweet is definitely not up to standard! It is the absolute last place I will choose now – if and when I have a choice. (Also, have you noticed how many kids seem to lick the salt cellars, the tables, the chairs and then who knows what they stick into the condiment bottles? – I still have 4 nephews below the age of 10…)

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  4. Nicole

     /  October 12, 2012

    It’s never too late to drink…

    Reply
  5. The Blessed Barrenness

     /  October 12, 2012

    Oh, let me just add, not chuckles of the giggling kind but chuckles of the chocolate kind!

    Reply
  6. The Blessed Barrenness

     /  October 12, 2012

    Eish! Sounds like a fun day! Bet it ended with wine & chuckles???

    Reply
  7. Alexandra

     /  October 12, 2012

    Okay I need to know how you get three children dressed and eaten in 45 minutes????????????

    I often take the children out to eat when DH is away – I reckon it’s easier than trying to cook a meal at home and there’s always the chance that I might get a few minutes to read – but we only ever go to children friendly places, like Spur.

    And on that note, why do people who don’t have children go to Spur?????

    Reply
  8. Arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!

    Reply

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