I squeezed this blog out of my loins …. well almost

Yesterday was my blogs birthday.  My first blog post ran on the 21 August 2009 – so Reluctant Mom is four years old today.

For those who don’t know me, it’s okay, I often wake up at night wondering if I know myself.  I do often wonder how I managed to get myself into this position – the position of being mom to three children.  When the number one issue is that I don’t actually like children (sure I like my own now, but I never played with dolls, and really tend to cringe back in terror when a young snotty happy faced short person runs towards me), and more importantly number two, I was very sure that I never wanted children.

My partner – Kennith – wanted children from the get go, I was very very reluctant and every time we had the conversation would wrap it up by saying “next year” knowing full well that next year was not going to be coming.  Six years into our relationship we had reached a cross-roads/an impasse and I fell pregnant with our first child when I was 28.  It was a totally planned endeavour.  This did not stop me sitting in the bath and crying like a knocked up 15 year old.  Read the rest of the post here …….

In blog years four is ancient.

Not the oldest, but definitely in the zimmer frame and spittle on the bottom lip when you talk category.

I have seen blogs that have come and gone.  Blogs that I have enjoyed and then started to peter out.

I have watched new blogs blossom, grow and then look like they were going to take over the world.

Then there is this one, that putters along at it’s own pace.  Some days willing itself to die, other days rising above it all to find true love in Tokai Forest.

I read through some of my earlier posts and I wonder how I could be so worried and so worked up about something then, that now would barely get a snort out of me.

I change, I learn, I make mistakes, I have the occasional emotional vomit.  I have tried to be disciplined about what I say here I would say to your face over dinner …. usually after two bottles of wine.

I never go back and delete a post, because when I think or say something at the time, that is how I feel.  I realise that as time shifts so does my perception of events and also my emotional reaction to something usually lessens, and with 20/20 hindsight it did look like I was really getting my panties into a bit of a knot.

This blog has helped me to process shit.  This blog has helped me to think out loud and have somewhere to put it.  This blog has connected me to so many people and their lives that I would never have encountered any other way.

Many of those people have move out of the “imaginary friends in cyber space” kind to the ones I sit and have dinner and wine with.

Thank you to the nearly 500 000 views that my blog has received.

Thank you to the 6 908 comments that have been left.  I hope both these numbers double!

Thanks to all the funny comments, the really clever comments, the comments that have made me examine my thinking in a constructive manner, the snubs, the rebukes, the odd stalker and heavy breather who came along and left his/her little bit of sticky on this blog.

I was thrilled to have spent a few cyber seconds with every one of you.

Thank you for sharing my love of books, and supporting some of my hair-brained schemes and ideas.

I can’t promise I will be here in 4 years.

I can however promise that future posts will be peppered with questionable grammar and too frequent use of fuck/fek/fkc/friggn/freakn and anything that rhymes with tomatoe.

Happy Birthday Reluctant Mom Blog – you are sort of awesome in all sorts of ways!!

Hip-hip-hooray!!!

 

Posted by reluctantmom on August 22, 2013

https://reluctantmom.wordpress.com/2013/08/22/i-squeezed-this-blog-out-of-my-loins-well-almost/