Happy butt sweat day everyone!

I have tried to start a “tradition” of asking the kids what is the most interesting thing that happened to you today, when we drive home from school.

Partly to avoid them arguing about who is looking out of whose windows, and partly so that I give the impression of being a patient, kind and interested parent.  Something about faking it until you make it.

I have tried this several times, and after many attempts and it always ending in “nothing” …. “so nothing happened today” …. “meh … nothing” … “so I am taking you to a school where you learn and you really learn nothing ALL day … not one thing” … “….{shrug}…”

I am so very glad I get to have the surly teenage phase whilst my kids are 8 and 12 respectively.

Yesterday I fetch Georgia and Connor, and Georgia is really excited.

She is bursting to tell me what happened in her day.

We all get in the car, buckle up, I reverse and I am waiting eagerly for her story.

The story that is going to help cement what a great parent I am, and how much my kids are inspired and learn in the school system I entrust them to each and every day.

Georgia: “Today, my pants and my shorts were wet ….”

Me: “Okay, did you not make it to the bathroom in time?”

Georgia: “No, it was not wet by the front end, it was wet by the butt end.”

Me – really struggling to pick up on the thread of this story – “Did you sit in something?”

Georgia: “No, today is the first day I had butt sweat!!”

She was not announcing this like I would announce that I had a bit of a leak on my pants because I could not get to the bathroom on time, and my bladder’s ability to keep a “tight ship” has started to decline in the last two or three years – she was telling this story like it was a wild achievement. Something to be proud of.

She went on.  And on.  For 45 minutes explaining butt sweat to me.  And her butt sweat specifically.

45 minutes is a very long time to talk about butt sweat.  Sober.  And trapped in a car with no where to go.

Eventually I just nodded and said “ah-huh” because there really is not much else to say on the subject.

She was so excited – it was a bit like Louis Pasteur working out the kinks to the rabies problem, but this was Georgia who was telling me it was so hot that she had made butt sweat.

I decided that it was the best story of the day and “high fived” her!

Seriously what were my options?

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5 Comments

  1. Alexandra

     /  January 27, 2014

    This is classic Reluctant Mom!

    Really struggled (and shook) to contain my laughter whilst reading this – I work in an open plan office.

    Reply
  2. Charlotte

     /  January 26, 2014

    Love it! I have exactly the same problem with my two boys – get the ‘nothing’ or ‘cant’ remember’ answer – seriously?? So now I tell them that I am not going to stop asking until they can think of one thing that they did that they can tell me about….so on Friday when I picked up my 6 year old and asked the inevitable question, he looked sideways at me; sighed deeply and saId “I picked my nose…” In a rare moment of quick thinking, I drolly replied “and did you eat what you picked or stick it under your desk?”

    Reply
  3. LOL!!! The things kids get excited about

    Reply
  4. “45 minutes is a very long time to talk about butt sweat. Sober. And trapped in a car with no where to go.” brilliant! lol

    Reply

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