You never really know someone …. and other snap judgements



Blogging is a funny old thing to do isn’t it?

You sit and write about your life, then have total strangers pop over and have a read.

Those total strangers leave comments, some times those comments are more “character building” than others.

And you meet those “strangers” — and in some cases you become friends, and in others you issue a restraining order.

I read other bloggers work – granted not as regularly as I used to.

I used to trawl around and discover bloggers.  Then spend 4 – 6 hours reading their blogs from the first post to the last.  It was like reading a novel, filled with happiness, heart ache, tears, joy, love and loss ….. quite beautiful to behold.

Bloggers and what they blog have changed my life significantly.

I have learnt so many life lessons through other people’s accounts of their lives.  Of what they have shared. Of what they have been brave enough to put out there for me to read.

I have laughed and cried over people and their joy and pain, who I will never meet.

For those few hours, whilst I read their blogs, I felt an affinity, a closeness with them, that resonated with me somewhere in my heart, or soul, or brain.

The problem with blogs, is that you actually are given snap shots in to a blogger’s world or life.  You do not actually know them.

Sure, you have an idea of who they are.  Possibly you get a sense of how they may react if you threw cold water on them, but you do not really know them.

Blogging, like anything creative is sometimes about a persona that is created.  Sometimes you write and it is with a particular slant, or a way of expressing yourself.  But is not actually who you are.  Not totally.

My blog gives glimpses of who I am.

I talk about how I feel at a particular time — it may be filled with emotion and raw honesty, because it is how I feel at that exact moment in time.

I have no issue with writing posts that I know I will disagree with in 10 days time.  Or where in 6 months I may have a totally different view on that subject.

How I feel on a day, and how I am able to express that thought and emotion is dependent on many factors.

What I write here is not the everything of me.  This is not a summary of who I am, this is not a “quick tool” to get to know me – a cheat sheet as it were.

To say that you know me absolutely based on the last four years of my writing, would be inaccurate.  Hasty.  Flawed.

I am glad – thrilled – that people read my blog.

Even though I have slowly become the world’s worst blogger —  I am madly excited that people cheer me on when I have had a shit day or am going through a bit of a disaster.   I often feel such a sense of joy when people send me private emails and leave messages on this blog.

In some cases people want to give me a hug when I am feeling bad —-  I think as a reader, and even as a blogger, it is good to make the realization that reading someone’s blog, does not make you know them.

This blog is not my life — it is portions that I choose to share with you.  But it is not the total sum of me.

I am all these things on this blog, and a thousand other things.  In some cases I am more, in others I am less.

I share a great deal.

I write on my blog, to large degree, like I am in real life.  There are parts of who I really am represented here, but there are many aspects to me that I keep to myself.  Those parts I share with people who know me, who really know me.  And parts I never share, because they are mine alone.

Please don’t think you know me just because you’ve read my blog.




Leave a comment


  1. Tanya

     /  May 27, 2014

    Really good to read this post Celeste because sometimes I struggle to put the you that I know and the blogging you together. This month makes 18 years since I left CT but somedays it feels just like yesterday that we were hanging out at Tumblers xx

  2. Well Reluctant Mom, your blogs I have read and the slivers of you I have come to know, be it just a part of you, have been an inspiration to me .. so thank you x

  3. Alexandra

     /  May 26, 2014

    You got it so right. I feel like I am best friends with the people whose blogs I read but of course I’m not and they don’t know a thing (or want to) about me.

    That said I would still like to meet you one day…

  4. I so love this post! I get that too – I’m very open on mine (have closed up some because people think they know everything… and really, it’s a sliver of the true you).

  5. Ahhhhh yes. After 18″years of blogging I have some readers that still read my blog! Why I have no idea!! What could possibly be so interesting?

    There are a number of Bloggers I immediately identified with. Others I read cause I know them or others because their material is worse than mine! lol

    I can’t imagine not blogging.

    I think your fab. The hundreds of bits you have shown me. #love

  6. Charne

     /  May 26, 2014

    True story!

  7. Leanne

     /  May 24, 2014

    This is true, I saw you at my psychologists rooms and my initial thought was to say hi, then I realised I didn’t really know you and it may just freak you out. When we follow someone’s blog you feel like you know them but sometimes it is important to realise you really don’t

    • Thank you for not running over and saying hello —- it still freaks me out that people recognise me, and then start chatting to me, and it becomes decidedly obvious they know me, and I am sitting there sort of staring at them in horror, because I do not know them from a bar of soap.

  8. Margot

     /  May 24, 2014

    Sounds like someone was an asshat to you. If someone left you a shitty comment I would personally very much like to come and rearrange their facial features for them. That is all.


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