How the hell does Kate do 8?

I am not a big television fan.

I get home, I tend to do what I need in terms of dinner/bath/bed for kids, and then attend to myself in roughly the same order.  Out of choice I would rather read a book, but Kennith has other plans, and Kennith is the one who holds the remote.

Any the way, I don’t DSTV channel surf much, as I am seldom allowed to hold the remote.  But now that I am at home and I sit in my little pseudo office, I turn the television on and switch to a documentary and leave it in the background.

That being said I have managed to catch several inserts of Kate Plus 8 or Kate Makes 8 – or what ever it is called.  Key point woman who is divorced, has a set of twins and then a set of sextuplets (is that the correct word?) and all these kids are under 10 years old.

Any the who, most of the shows I have caught are her on outings with her 8 / EIGHT kids – I seriously have no idea how she does it.

Today I fetch the kids from school.  I stop at Woolworths, and I want to run in – I want to leave all three of them in the car and pop in.

Isabelle starts screaming her head off as she wants to come with me.  Georgia and Connor start screaming – not raising their voices – but screaming “I’M THE BOSS, I’M THE BOSS, I’M THE BOSS…” and then arguing vehemently about who will be the boss whilst I am away.

I am sitting in the driver’s seat wondering if I should just gas us all now – but then I think of how dos Kate copes with 8?

She always appears to have good hair, well french manicured nails, no roots showing, and usually is wearing heels with shorts.  She sometimes appears a little ruffled, but I never hear her cursing at her kids or going ape shit – maybe they edit those bits out.

I am just trying to pop in to Woolworths for a Macaroni and Cheese with Bacon (I had a craving) and I can’t even do that without my three going totally bat shit.

I have no idea how Kate Gosselin does it.

To get divorced and not fight for the other parent to take custody – with 8 kids!!!  That is really one of those times when you want your partner to take the kids, and you get visitation every second Wednesday night for three hours, up until they are about 12.

Anyway, I am going to google Kate (with 8) and figure out if she is on medication, because god’s truth there is no way any earthly person could look that good, have eight children and not be drinking by 10am!!

A bit lost and found ……

So anyway, I feel like I have fallen off the edge of the earth a bit.  Apologise for not updating my blog, I really have not known what to say.  And I did feel an overwhleming desire to hide my head under my duvet and feel quite sorry for myself.

I am so used to getting up in the morning, screaming at kids, putting my clothes on, brushing my teeth, chasing everyone out, doing the morning drop off and then dashing off to work, and that is where I spend the next 8 – 10 hours of my life.   Frantic.  Chaotic. But generally enjoying what I do.

The last month has left me feeling a bit “lost” – I get up and do all the parts, but then I have no where I have to go.

I know if anyone is a working mom and reading this odds are the thoughts are “enjoy it, go where ever you want….I am so jealous…” and of course it is all very nice not having to be somewhere and rushing there, but at the same time it isn’t.

I need to work.  I really do.  I get to do that heart shaped movement with my forefingers and say “you complete me” when I go to work.

First week of no work I ran around a bit in a frenzy of “fk sake, must find a job, must must must!!!”

Week two was a bit more of the same and running to interviews.

Week three was where the steam ran out of the “little engine that could” and I sort of slumped and felt a bit at a loss of what to do.

End of week three and into week four saw me on the couch vegging and watching Game of Thrones.

Week five saw me relaxing and celebrating my birthday.  My fortieth birthday.  40 puts you as close to 60 as you are to 20, which is past depressing.

Other than the age issue, I had such an incredible birthday weekend.  Relaxing, and a wonderful time.  I spent  it with lovely, generous and funny friends and equally gorgeous wine.  Really just what I needed.

I swore that on the 11 May I would pick myself up and aim myself in a direction and attempt to look wholly committed to something.  Anything.

I have had a touch of flu, so Kennith was kind enough to let me have a sleep in on Friday whilst he took kids to school.  The result was I really committed to a good long sleep until about 2pm – and the 11th got crossed off the list of the day that I got moving.

But this weekend I said, really I am going to get behind something. And. Monday is the day.

I dropped kids off, and then felt that usual funk I get when that part of the morning activities are done, but this morning I decided I am going to put on my big girl panties and get my A in to G.

I got home and then cleaned the garage.

Like wild frantic mad woman garage cleaning.

The one where spittle forms on your chinny chin chin  And you get that slightly deranged look about you.  Just like that.

I sorted out the kids’ tv room and moved furniture around and set myself up a little work nook.  Let’s not call it an office, as I need a drinks fridge and a wine display before I will call it an office.

Haven’t done any work yet, because I am exhausted from cleaning the garage, but I believe tomorrow is another day.

Off the couch and out the door ….

You know how when you work, you are so busy, but make these mental plans that if you had an afternoon off you would re-arrange the spice rack, cure cancer, and figure out how to reset the flashing time thing on the oven.

I also had those dreams, aspirations and misguided delusions that all full-time working people suffer from.  If only I had some time.

Since finding myself in my altered state of employment,I have proceeded to do next to nothing.  Last week I sat on the couch. Okay I lay.  Not as in the grammatical incorrect “to tell an untruth.”

I literally lay on the couch from Monday through to Wednesday.  I just did not feel like doing anything.  What I did instead was curl up on the couch, with a blankie, a cup of tea and two seasons of Game of Thrones.

That series is brilliant, if you do not mind full frontal nudity (boy and girl) people randomly having explicit sex (this makes Californication look like something you would put on for the kids).

There is a lot of having sex, killing people (sometimes at the same time) a very complex system of kingdoms, and wildly different seasons – but if you look past that (or are motivated by that) a really brilliant miniseries.

I did push myself up off the couch on Thursday and decided to finally get down to the South African Jewish Museum, and the Holocaust Museum in Cape Town.

I have never been, and have been meaning to go there for years.

I had some time after that – what with not exactly needing to get to work and found myself at the South African National Art Gallery.

I must confess that I really had a fabulous day.

But then I sat in traffic for 1 hour and 40 minutes for a drive that should have taken me 20 minutes, and that did take away from the shine a little.

{photographs taken with my iphone using instagram}