Let’s Pretend This Never Happened ….

While over at my local Exclusive Books, I stumbled across “Let’s Pretend This Never Happened {A Mostly True Memoir} by Jenny Lawson The Bloggess.”

I have not read many of her posts, but the one about Beyonce the Chicken stuck firmly in my mind.

I laughed and snorted out loud to that post.

If I am feeling a bit down in the dumps I always think about Beyonce the Chicken, and it perks me right up.

I am always looking for the sister/brother to Beyonce the Chicken, because I can’t think of a purchase that would make me happier.  Well, other than the biker mouse I saw on e-bay yesterday.

I thoroughly enjoyed The Bloggess’ book “Let’s Pretend This Never Happened

She really is hysterically funny, and has this dry “there is nothing to see here” style which I adore.  Enjoyed the book thoroughly.

There were so many bits of this book that I snorted at – here are two – hopefully I do not get cited on a copyright infringement :

“Anyway, my dad had just finished cleaning the deer when I made a reckless fast, ninja-turn U-turn to avoid getting tagged by my sister, and that’s when I ran.  Right. The Fuck. Inside the deer.  It took me a moment to realise what had happened, and I stood there, kind of paralyzed and not ninja-like at all.   The best way I can describe it is that it was kind of like wearing a deer sweater.  Sometimes people laugh at that, but it’s not an amused laugh. It’s more of an involuntary nervous giggle of what-the-fuckness.  Probably because you aren’t supposed to wear deer for sweaters.  You’re not supposed to throw up inside them either,but that doesn’t mean it didn’t happen.”

“Then I drove myself to work and I almost passed out from a combination of the pain and the not-breathing, and when I got there I hurt so much I couldn’t even move my mouth to talk, so I wrote ‘I HAVE BROKEN MY NECK,” on a Post-it, and my bewildered office mate drove me to the hospital.  Turns out I’d herniated a disc, and the doctor gave me a pamphlet on domestic abuse and kept asking m whether someone was hurting me at home, because apparently most people don’t herniate their discs simply from brushing their hair too hard.  I prefer to think that most people just don’t brush their hair as enthusiastically as I do.”

I enjoyed this book.  Every page of it.  Loved the photographs.  Loved the captions.

I sat and read this book in about a day and a half.  Best time ever in bed.  With a book!

So, listen, I loved the book, and I am sure you will love the book as well.

If you would like to read “Let’s Pretend this Never Happened” by Jenny Lawson, and would like a signed copy.  Signed by me.  Not by the uber talented Jenny Lawson I am afraid, then just let me have your postal address.

I have one-previously-read book that I will send on to you – I think this is the type of book you should share with anyone who needs a lie down a giggle.

What would be really cool is if you could read the book, you comment on it on your blog, you sign the book, then you pass the book on to the next person.

How does that sound?  It’s like a game of play-it-forward-fuckness in all its beauty.


The only downside is Jenny will not be getting royalties as there is only one book doing the rounds.  But I am sure she will understand, or not.

If you have not fully experience the totally fucken hilarity that is Jenny Lawson, then this will be a good day for you.

Want the book?  Leave me your postal address — please only in South Africa.  I only have one book, so this is not an Oprah give away where everyone finds something under their seat.

Happy reading, and laughing, and all kinds of warm happiness.

Rush Home Road by Lori Lansens …

Another book that has been lying in my book shelf for ages, collecting dust and I have been meaning to read.

Book Title:  Rush Home Road

Author:  Lori Lansens

What’s the book about?  Addy Shadd is a seventy year old woman who lives in a trailer park (out of choice) and circumstances conspire that she is put in the position to take care of Sharla Cody who is a five-year old little girl living in a nearby trailer, with a somewhat unavailable mother.

The story is about how Addy and Sharla change each other’s lives, and as the book progresses, the story of Addy’s life unfolds.  There is nothing jarring or frantic in this book – though the characters and experiences are told with empathy and a real sense of “it was like I was there” quality – the story flows easily and you get carried along on its current.

The jacket describes the book as “Rush Home Road, the story of a seventy-year old woman’s journey through the unbearable sorrows of her past, in order to save an abandoned little girl, is a first novel of exquisite power, honesty, and conviction.  Its portrait of how much has changed, and how little, over nearly a century, in the realms of race, love, hate and loss, is nearly without flaws.”

Who told you about the book?  No one, it is one of those where the cover had some sort of appeal, but I was not sure what or why.

What resonated with you about the book?  The book is not a story with a beginning, middle and an end.  You feel you have stumbled into the lives of Addy and Sharla, and you get to walk a bit with them on this road they are on.

Time needed to read? 387 pages, 1 1/2 line spacing, not a huge commitment, probably took 3 – 4 days of reading a bit before bed each night.

Where did you purchase the book?  Books Galore, which is a discounted book store at Plattekloof Shopping Centre.

Would you save this book, pass it along to a charity store, or pass it along to a fellow avid reader?  My initial feeling was to toss it, but there is something haunting about this book.  I have it lying next to me right now, and I keep glancing at it, and the story does sit with you for a long time.  I would probably pass it along to someone – probably my mom.

Rating out of a possible 5:  3 1/2 – not a must read, but a “quite a good read.”