Inside report back on the Exclusive Books SALE!!

I am not sure I can effectively describe how brilliant this morning was.

I went along, and wanted to make sure I was there at 09h00.  I am  nerdy like that.

The glory of walking into a small warehouse with trestle tables, with more books than you could easily set fire to.  I started at the one side of one trestle table and worked my way through very systematically.

I brought along three of the canvas Woolworths bags – and thought that would be more than enough.

Who am I kidding? I filled two of them before I was even finished on trestle table one.

I loved it – everything about it.  The helpers at the SALE were phenomenally friendly and helpful – it is the first day, and possibly by day three they will be slightly jaded and less friendly.

They kept offering me cupcakes!!  Books and cupcakes – if they had swung around with a cup of tea, I might have kissed them with tongue right there and then at trestle table three.

I bought more books that I could ever read (as if!!)

I bought books for Xmas and birthday gifts.  They had Gruffalo stuff there as well – I have realised I do not buy Gruffalo stuff for the kids, I actually buy it for me.

They had lots of children books, and I totally spent the children’s university fund on those.

I bought three books on how to discuss the subject of your children growing pu.bic hair and other fun stuff – so Connor will be in for a treat, from which he will want to die shortly.

To add to the spoils, they had a lot of the things they sell at Exclusive Books – the mugs, the reading lights, the iphone covers, bookmarks, key rings, and all of those cool things there was all – also calculated by weight!  Can you say “going absolutely ape shit?”

I really really bought A LOT of stuff.

Way too much – I did get that frenzy behaviour and start to foam at the mouth —- but I am now going to start saving 10% of my salary towards the Exclusive Books SALE next year, so I am more prepared.

It is so worth a trip to the sale –  prepare before hand.

Take some bags to carry your loot, take some water as at a point you start to feel dry mouthed and a bit panicked that you will not have the strength to make it through, but focus, and keep on!!!  Do not take children with you – really they will distract you from you being able to pour over all the tables.

Have a bag that you can wear strapped across your chest or put your wallet in a fanny pack – keep your hands free, because at a certain point you will start behaving like a rabid-infected-book-monger.

I assume that they just keep bringing new stock through – while I was trying to pay, they kept arriving with STILL MORE THINGS.  It was so difficult to leave.

Exclusive Books – fabulous flipping sale!!  Definitely added as the highlight in my calendar.

If you are in Cape Town, if you can drive to Cape Town — get there —- now!!!

Find out more information about the sale here ———————>>

Princess and the Penis ….. real book title …. honest

I like books, I really do.

Sometimes I read the odd book that is out of my genre of choice.

I love Alison Weir, Agatha Christie and Bill Bryson. I adore books about Sherlock Holmes and anything that deals with British Monarchy.  Right now I am reading a British Monarchy history dealing with the “War of the Roses” and also a Sherlock Holmes book.

Kennith suggests reading British Monarchy History it is like watching ENews, but with Lindsay Lohan as the Village Tramp and Paris Hilton as Queen Anne …. I don’t disagree.

But I find history books quite enthralling, and I do understand why other people fog over when I tell them about the plot, so I tend not to blab about my books too much …. any more.

<I also like movies set in World War II for some reason … and I “enjoy” reading books that have the holocaust as a backdrop ….>

I once even read a Chelsea Handler book, so I do think I am pretty open-minded regarding books and ones I pick up and “try” even though some times good sense should intervene.

I draw the line at Jody Picoult (hate, really I do) and Sidney Sheldon (hate it more, probably the seventy-seven paragraphs rambling about the scenery) and my personal cringe is Danielle Steele.

I am not suggesting you do not read them, please do.  Buy as many of them as you can.  The more you purchase increases my luck of them being sold out, and then I do not have to see them on the shelves.

Possibility of pure joy moment.

Yesterday on Amazon under Kindle e-books I saw “The Princess and the Penis…” its a book, and it costs $0.99.

I went to look at the reviews, as I was not quite sure if I had read the title correctly or this was a case of a really bad typo.

But it appears it is quite an “enjoyable read…” and “fast paced….”

The product description is described as: A beautiful, chaste, and completely naive princess encounters a strange lump in  her mattress. The lump soon morphs into a shape familiar to everyone but her, triggering her curiosity and her father’s greatest fears. He frantically tries to intervene, but having a large phantom phallus in a curious maiden’s bed is never a good combination.

I loved this excerpt from the one reviewer, which really at the end of the day sums up many romance novels:

After reading about 14,952 romance novels, a few things become clear. No matter what the story is about–a duke, a werewolf, a football player, a Carpathian vampire, a steampunky swashbuckler, a baker, a lawyer, a candlestick maker, or even an Orca shapeshifter–the real star of the show is actually…the p*nis. Yes, this is in fact true. It gets tons of attention, pages and pages of highly detailed description, and often saves the day.

So that is it at then end of it all.

Princess Amelia and her lumpy mattress and the relationship she forms with the mattress.

I am not sure if you left me for 100 years with a pen and a sheet of paper, or a keyboard I would have come up with this particular slant on a rather aging-but-classic tale…

Now who amongst us had not woken up before with a lumpy mattress in our back?

I can’t say I feel like a Princess at the time, but there we go, time to shift your thinking…… or get a double bunk.

If you want to download the book on your Kindle, pop down to: