Maybe parenting … and mathematics … is not for everyone …



Please pop along and vote for The Reluctant Mom’s Blog for SA’s Best Mommy Blogger 2013


Nominations close on the 30 November 2013.

You are the adult … buckle up your child …. you dumb ass!

I get so annoyed when I am driving and I see kids who are not bucdles up — I get angry, like roll down your window and scream like a mad woman when I see kids jauntily bouncing around on seats and the parent blissfully driving along.

I do the morning school drop off and the afternoon school pick up – and easily more than 70% of the cars I see with children have the children driving seat-belt free.

I see the lack of putting a seat belt on yourself and your child as an indicator of IQ – or the lack of it in a certain area.

I do look at the person, then I look at the car they are driving and try to figure out where it all went wrong.  I figure that they did not walk into the 7-eleven and put cash down and pick a car.

Odds are they had to fill out some forms and go through a basic purchasing process to get the car.  It requires a bit of mental athleticism, and some dexterity with a pen and maybe a sheet of paper.

I am not suggesting that people who drive cars are gifted.

I am suggesting that if you have gone through the process of purchasing a car, and learning how to drive, your IQ should cover the basic two digit cut off point. You may even be pushing the range of “average” or “normal” somewhere between 85 and 115.

The question that I ask is.  If you are of average intelligence, clearly able to drive, and possibly able to negotiate the many pitfalls of car purchasing, why can you not figure out that when your car is being propelled forward at 65km an hour and you have a child toddling around say by him or her self or even better with you sitting in the front or back seat holding said baby – when said car comes to an abrupt stop that said child will continue to travel at 65km an hour until said child hits something that will impede it’s travelling speed?

For instance, a windscreen – which they will go through – usually with the big melon that sits above their shoulders.  The windscreen might not stop them. It will definitely assist in slowing them down, until they hit the tar of the road and their skull makes that shattering sound.

It really is not a difficult concept to understand.  Why do parents/adults not insist on buckling up their children?

What could be the reason for not doing it?  9 months seems an awfully long time to gestate a child just so you can vault it through a windscreen at an incredible speed!  Or am I misunderstanding the appeal of this no buckling up thing?

Is there a benefit of spending time at Red Cross Children’s Hospital watching them hook your child up to a ventilator whilst another doctor tries to piece together bits of your offsprings skull and grey matte,r in some crazy 10 000 piece puzzle with no box cover to act as a guide?

Is there a benefit of standing explaining to the now permanently traumatized paramedic that you did not see that car, as it jumped out in front of you, and that your child was standing between the car seats, but now has his head bashed open on the pavement?

What would your reason be when you could have avoided it with something that is sold mandatory with all cars?

I am totally open to hearing both sides of this argument.

So far I have not had one person stand up and go: “You know I personally do not believe in buckling up my child, I think it is a waste of time, and I think that the risk of my child’s brains being bashed out are so miniscule that this is all a conspiracy theory put together by those freaks over at PG Glass!”

If you are that parent, please let me know – maybe your argument is something I have not considered.

Meanwhile, I am quite a fan of Buckle Me Up on Facebook – love this page.

Besides the sage advise this page dishes out, my personal favourite is the name-and-shame photographs people post of drivers who allow kids to drive unbuckled in their cars.  Epic Parenting Fails!!

Here are some images from their site – maybe you know one of these peeps, or you are one of these peeps featured here ….

Lindy Crous – August 29 – Saw this car with a child standing on the back seat at the busy Fairtrees and De Bron Intersection at 4pm today.

2 August ar 17h00 on Bosmansdam road… 2 kids jumping around the back seat …..(there was a universal comment regarding the Jesus Saves sticker, but I think putting your child at this level of risk then expecting Jesus to save your child smacks of a bit of cheek in my opinion)

Taken in Sea Point on the 26th March… in Sea Point

14 March 2012 – Taken on modderdam road yesterday 17:20. Three children in the car.. all unbuckled.. thank you Marthie Kemp for posting …{is that a child between a buckle up safely tag x 2 on the back of this car ….. sigh}

Buckle up people, really you are the adult- there is no excuse for a child in the car you are driving not to be  buckled up! If you child does not like to be buckled up and screams, just say fk it, and buckle him/her up anyway.

Shelly Khumalo – Mampoer of the Week Award?

So Shelly pops down the local mall, and decides that she is going to nip in for a few moments and is reluctant to drag ALL her kids with her.

Who of us hasn’t?

I popped in to Woolworths today and left my three in my car.  Parking conditions and temperature was slightly different .. and no doubt there is a fair amount of tut-tutting and arrangement of facial features in a judgemental expression going on.

I am not trying to align myself with Shelly I am trying to indicate that she is not totally alone in this regard <<the one of stupid parenting decisions>>

Shelly has 4 children – and she used the” two with me, two in a boiling hot car” approach.

I can’t say I recommend this approach – unless you specifically do not want four children at the end of your shopping experience.  But there we go.  Clearly a serious facebook palm if there ever was one.

No doubt Shelly is an overtired mom making stupid decisions <<two kids under 2, clearly indicates she is sleep deprived at the very least>>.   Another factor is that Shelly drives a BMW  – I am naturally suspicious of BMW drivers, they do not seem to understand channelling lines on the N1, nor how to use their indicator lights and traffic circles confuse them totally.  Shelly also is from Vereeniging.

There are so many factors in this story.

She thought 2 young kids in a locked car in a parking lot when the temperature was close to 36 degrees, with a window slight ajar was a great idea.  It seems passer-byers, the police and the grim reaper thought otherwise.  And thank goodness for who ever had the good sense to smash in her car window — I might have taken a few whacks at her bonnet and car door for good measure, but that is me.

Shelly appeared in court earlier this week and was released on R2000.00 bail.  We all know if  she should just have been charged with being stupid, then she might have faced execution right now.

Shelly Khumalo is the poster child for everything that is wrong with being a mother and votes are in for the secret ballot that is Worst Parent of the Year 2011.

I have no idea what possesses her to leave her two kids in a car, in the heat.  Not a particularly bright idea and she really could have killed her kids.  She gets a 2 from the Chinese judge in this round, the UK judge scored her a 1.

I have no idea who she is or what the circumstances were around this rather unfortunate day.

My guess is her younger kid(s) might have been asleep.  She figured instead of dragging 4 kids screaming into a shopping centre with them going ape shit, she would do the next best thing.  Leave the two sleeping, and only drag the two older ones in as they would already be screaming <if you have ever dragged a child to a mall you will know what I am talking about> and run in and then run out.

Seems like a good plan.  In principle.  In execution, not so much.

But stupid people often become stupid parents, and stupid parents do make stupid decisions.

Sometimes really clever parents do really stupid things.  And average parents sort of swing between really clever and totally fkd up decision making.

I will be honest here – Shelly and her stupidity barely raises my eyebrow (I think I was distracted with cocaine-in-dreadlock lady as epic fail of the week).

Every day I drive my kids to school I see parents with young kids standing on the front seat, sitting unbuckled in the car, standing between the seats, sitting on their parent’s lap … or a combination of these variations.

Most of the parents who drop their kids off at both my kids’ schools do not buckle their kids up.

Shelly gets a fine, gets her named dragged through the press, and is probably a prize mampoer.  I see parents every day who risk the lives of their kids driving on busy roads, to about the same degree than Shelly did.

The same parents probably do not give their kids Niknaks and Oros, because it is “bad for them…” but reason out that flying through a windscreen at 60km an hour will be okay.

I am not suggesting that because there are so many stupid parents, we should go light on young Shelly from Vereeniging – but I do want to draw attention to how many stupid parents there are doing stupid things that risk the lives of their children, every day, and those people are not being torn apart by the feeding frenzy.

I hope her kids are okay.

I hope she takes something from this other than it being a really crappy decision.  I hope this event acts as an eye opener to parents who have probably locked their kids in hot cars, and it never dawned on them that this was a bad idea.