{spoiler alert}
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{second warning of spoiler alert}
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{third warning of an image that might make you aware of where babies come from}
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{final warning – if you are a bit sensitive, if you in any way think that women do not have pubic hair on their fannies, and if you have any doubts and wish to keep the mystery alive of unicorns and rainbows, then please flick away from this blog post ….}
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Really, don’t look ……………. if you do not want to see hair, a vagi.na triangle and might know that babies do not arrive in a clean, sterile environment, and there is a chance of clouds and meatballs.
One ……………..
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Two …………….
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Three …………..
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Are you okay, and you still want to read, and promise not to shit in your pants?
I posted a picture of lady-with-baby recently on the Reluctant Mom Facebook page, and to be honest I posted it because it made me look twice.
I did not recoil in horror. I just thought “well holy haloumi that is an unusual picture which includes an umbilical cord!”
Don’t think I have seen one of those. Ever.
I got a few really odd responses and eventually the gods at Facebook decided to take the image down as it contravened their sense of family values (actual wording). Then I read a blog post over at Cath Janes and it helped to cement some thoughts that were rolling around in my head.
People were offended that they could see a woman with a v-triangle of pubic hair.
You could not see her breasts, you could not see inside her vagina.
You could see a cord which one would presume is the umbilical cord from her vagina to her baby.
I received a few comments which were not ideal, and I received a few personal messages which were less than “complementary” to me and lady-with-baby.
People appeared to think she was hideous, fat and hairy — oh and that umbilical cord was really unsavoury — they seem genuinely surprised that women did not squeeze a baby out, and did not immediately have shaved v-jay-jay, a flat stomach and perfect hair and makeup.
I know, the horror!!! She also appears to have left a wet spot on the bed. Yes, I know what a messy messy girl this is —
I relooked at this picture, and I am not sure of exactly how, assuming you are older than six, you can be surprised/offended by this image.
Again, if this sort of thing offends you, then why are you reading my blog —- it is clear we are walking different paths, and might need to uncement (not a word, but I liked the way it sounded) our relationship. Immediately.
If you are offended, don’t look.
If lady-withbaby offends you then sweet jasmine, this Titian image must do your head in. I have no idea why you would listen to an organist without any clothes on, and with your dog in the room. Clearly 1548 was a strange time to be alive!
I have commented before that as women we are deeply offended by any visual of a va.gin.a. We (women, not so much men) are led to believe that our bodies are dirty, and ugly and we should be shameful.
The comment that lady-with-baby – who has just pushed a giant baby out of her vaginal passage is fat, and ugly is such a ridiculous and stupid comment to make.
The comment that this woman must shave as her bush is unattractive, makes me again wonder at our fascination with full grown women having to shave/wax their pubic area to appear like pre pubescent girls.
I am not going to apologise for posting this image. I will apologise that I did not give it the respect it deserves on first posting it.
Lady-with-baby you rock!!
With baby, with umbilical cord —- I think you look fantastically good, I think the fact you took a photo with a pulsating umbilical cord was brilliant!!
I wake up most mornings looking far worse than you did after delivering a baby.